Originally posted, August 4, 2015.
As a musician and a technology writer for an insurance company, I live a double life. Triple life, if you count Linked-In. My musical half (playing and writing music since the 1960s) has been experimenting with some of the tactics recommended by this generation of music career “coaches,” including expanded internet presence. Actually that’s more curiosity than anything – I don’t expect to start a full-blown music career at this stage in my life, but I frequently help younger musicians with such questions and would like to have more than hearsay to go on. That said, my still-have-to-earn-a-living half remembers countless friends who have been bullied or browbeaten at work for having outside interests, and – most specifically – two talented, hardworking graphic artists for a schoolbook publisher who were fired for occasionally getting out their banjos on their lunch hour – good thing I always kept mine in the trunk.
Many professional (non-music) contacts over the years have friended me on Facebook or Linked-In. Occasionally recruiters will google my personal home page paulrace.com just to make certain I’m reasonably “normal.”
So those aren’t necessarily the best places to post protest songs or silly songs about working in an office or the like. Or even to talk about music and related issues as though I take them seriously. That’s why paulracemusic.com was born.
Here’s a question – how many of you live a double life as a musician or artist or something else? I think it’s harder when you go “up the scale.” Nobody raises their eyebrows when they find out that their waiter is in a band, or their favorite barista is taking art classes. But if you’re an insurance company manager who would rather play bass guitar or paint landscapes than golf, you’ll hit a “glass ceiling” in a hurry.
I’m still getting used to this blogging software, so if you post a comment and it doesn’t show up within a few hours, I probably screwed something up. So I’m asking in advance for your forgiveness. But I would be interested to know how many other folks have the feeling that they’re leading a double life in this sense?
Since I wrote this article, I got several responses from other independent musicians who thought I was being paranoid. (Obviously they never worked where I have.) This week, I got a response from a fellow who is no longer a spring chicken, working in a demanding technical job, and spinning turntables for weddings and dances on the weekends. He wouldn’t even tell me his real name or stage name, under the conviction that he will never be taken seriously in his occupation again if word gets out.
Something I learned a long time ago in a dog-eat-dog profession – just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean people aren’t plotting against you. I’ve been passed over for promotions and had other career setbacks for dumber things than being an avocational musician. Like preferring gardening to golf in a company that owned its own golf course, for one.
My reader has had similar experiences and is similarly afraid of a repeat experience in his current job if word gets out about his “side job.” In fact several of the things he said in his email were almost exactly the same as my experiences.
Now I’m wondering if the reason more people didn’t report similar experiences is they’re afraid word will get out about THEM. If you’re a closet musician, comedian, artist, poet, or any sort of creative person who is afraid of ridicule or worse from your coworkers and managers if word of your avocation gets out, please understand I totally sympathize.
Why am I publishing all of this now, in front of “God and everybody”? Because I am at the stage in my life where my employer can only hurt me so much if they find out I’d rather be playing banjo than running agile scrums or formatting reports for upper management. Not like those earlier days, when keeping food on the table, making house payments, paying for braces and college and a thousand other things kept me working in toxic situations where exposing that I didn’t fit the “ideal” corporate image could literally get me fired.
To all of the “underground creatives” – I wish you the best and want you to know that I would never betray your confidence. I also hope you can hold out until you get into a position where the opinions of your bosses and coworkers toward your creative side become less important.
CARRY ON! 🙂